Ruby Tuesday - Edition 1

I took a hiatus from this blog. It just got so heavy so fast.

I wanted to think of a way to bring some levity into it, and I recently had an epiphany...that should have been a regular, obvious thought.

What provides the levity in parenting of all types? Well, the kids, of course.

It is a truth universally acknowledged that a grownup in possession of a small child must be oft entertained. 

Without further ado, what follows is just a sprinkling of some of the uniquely RUBY things that have happened in the last week. 

(And the Tuesday part is because it's Tuesday, and this may or may not happen again on other Tuesdays in the future. No promises.)

---

Poetry

She discovered that if you go over the bumpy, bright yellow panels in the Safeway parking lot on foot, it doesn't feel nearly as cool as when you go over them while riding in the grocery cart.

I explained that it feels cooler in a cart because of the wheels.

And she, in Seussian fashion, said: "Yeah! And I don't have any wheels. I just have feet that crumble-bumble, stomp, stomp, stomp!"

----

Agriculture

Ruby loves her some nature. 

Lots of days, she goes into the back yard at like 7am with a portion-pack Ziploc bag and gathers up some kind of nature, which she then presents to me while I am still drooling on my pillow.

Her after-school care teacher, Miss Casey, described this scene to us:

"We were all playing outside, and I look over and see Ruby sitting in the dirt, covering herself with more dirt...so I go to check on her and she has a wad of feathers shoved in her shirt pocket. I asked her why she needs to keep all that stuff, and she said, 'I'm a collector! I collect things!'"

That same day, Ruby told Miss Casey that she wants to be a farmer when she grows up, and on her farm she'll have blueberries and horses.

---

Theology

We recently started a new Bible story book called Mrs. Lee's Stories About God's First People.

After we read the story about God creating Adam, she asked what Adam's last name was, and I said that Adam didn't have a last name, because at that time he was the only person on Earth and he didn't need a last name. 

Based on that, she declared: "In Heaven, we won't have to have last names, and we won't have to brush our hair because it will never get tangly."

---

Following the Rules

As all parents know, if you ask your kid how school was, she'll say, "Good," and if you ask her what she did, she'll say, "I don't 'member. I have a good remembery, but I don't 'member."

So, I try to get different answers using a trick that some wiser mom taught me: ask what the best and worst parts of the day were.

The best part of the day usually revolves around some kind of sugar intake ("When we got 3 Skittles for being good!").

Sometimes there is no worst part because, "I just likeded everything!"

The other day, though, the worst part was "when Jullian [Jillian, Julian? She says it "Jullian" every time] made Bekka sad. And you know what I did? Start patting her back. I was just Being a Caring Friend, 'cause that's rule #4."

---

Gift-giving

"Maybe if it's Easter or your birthday or Tuesdays or Wednesday or Fridays, I'll give you presents. But not every day. Only on special days. And it will be a special surprise in a Ziploc. And maybe when Uncle picks me up one day, I'll ask him if we can dye you eggs, and it will be a surprise because I won't tell you what color it is."

---

Math

---

Exercising

While Ruby gets ready for bed, Dustin and I usually clean up from dinner. She usually comes out of the bathroom/her bedroom 40-50 times to tell us play-by-play what is happening. To wit:

"I was trying to put my PJs on but the bar on my bed hit my BABY TOE."

"I think you'll be alright."

"Yeah, but it did hurted. But sometimes I'm tough. You know why I'm tough?"

"Why?"

"'Cause I been exercising. And I'm getting tougher. So now sometimes I hurt myself and I don't cry." 

"Cool."

"Yeah, and sometimes when I fall on my bottom I laugh cause it's funny if you fall on a bottom. 'Cause bottoms are funny." *giggles*

---

Career Decisions

"I changed my mind about being a farmer."

"Why?"

"Because if I'm a farmer I will have to take care of stinky pigs."

---

That's our Ruby Kooby. She sure keeps us laughing.